TNC2- PUBLIC TRANSPORT PALAVA

Today was.. is… (this english thing sef)… I was shaa born on the 26th Day of May! And with all the festivities, I felt so blessed! The calibre of people God has blessed me with! I cannot complain! I am INDEED FAVOURED! I just want to use this medium to appreciate you all! Thank you for the calls, prayers, texts! everything! God will remember your labor of love and you shall be celebrated even more!

I have decided to give a little something back! It cannot be compared to all the love I received today, but this is what I have — Please, read, share and COMMENT!!!

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Before my service year, I never really travelled by road on my own. The longest road trip I ever really did was from Kaduna to Abuja, and that’s just two hours and it had never really been in a commercial car. It was usually with my parents/siblings or a driver or a family member/friend or someone I knew! So coming to my state of posting, a journey that would take 8 hours was really exciting for me. I love adventures and I love visiting new places.

Ever since I got to my new ‘home’, I’ve had more opportunities to use these commercial buses with about 7-12 complete strangers.

Based on my observation, I’ve found that in these buses, are different characters of people (obviously)… and just for fun, I’ve decided to classify them and give them some sort of title/label that you should look out for the next time you’re in a bus and also so you can identify yourself.

  • The DJ- aka, the driver- The guy who mans what radio station or boring cassette tape we all HAVE to listen to. This guy is usually very aggressive perhaps as a result of driving total strangers around for hours. Passengers on buses are usually rude to this guy… I don’t quite get why… I mean… why would I want to upset the man whose behind the wheels to the car I’m about to enter?… You want him happy and alert not angry and grumpy… right? If he vexes and decides to crash the car nko?… lol.
  • The Business Man/Phone Call Guy- This one is constantly on the phone trying to ensure the “containers get to Onitsha” or some other state. The gender of this person may differ but you can be certain that be it male or female, they’ll be loud! I assume the person on the other end of the call is deaf because the degree of shouting is beyond me! They’re usually really condescending. Like they are beyond being in a bus or something! I don’t get it. Get your own car na, why are you angry with the rest of us?
  • The Snorer- I entered a bus once and the driver asked this guy to move to the back of the car. Apparently, people who sleep are bad momentum for the guy driving and as such shouldn’t sit in front –just incase you’re chased from the front to the back seat. The snorer usually appears in the physical form of a man whose wife should’ve stopped him from eating years ago…. Mr. Snorer is loud and really should get his nasal cavity checked!
  • The Human Rights Activist- The guy who makes it his priority to fight for the passengers rights- ‘oga driver, you cant put 4 people there, it’s already tight’, ‘oga driver this box would break somebody’s head oh’ ‘oga driver, no too speed na’… Mr. Martin Luther King has good intentions but is usually really rude. He’s the leader of the gang that tries to annoy the driver into killing us!
  • The Hommies- Those two or more people who know each other from home and decide to gist the entire trip! Through out! Like… don’t they run out of what to say? Usually in some annoying dialect that just pinches the ear and from the intensity of the gist, you can tell they’re gossiping… needless to say, these are usually women. Because women never run out of gist!
Beautiful young people in the cafe

Aunties… please na!

  • The Waiter- That guy who is trying to be nice but really is just disturbing us with food… he’s the one that buys things on the road and tries to offer everyone on the bus… thank you sir but no thank you. Shey if I wanted I would’ve bought by myself!
  • The Toaster- This one… hmmm… he tries to hit on every girl on the bus. I mean… you just asked the girl next to me for her number brother… why are you still asking me? In such a confined space? Have some shame sir! When we drop you can try but ha,ahn!
  • The Priest- That guy who always instigates a prayer before the car really starts to move. It usually begins with “shall we just say a short prayer before the journey begins…” and ends maybe 20 minutes later (Ok.. Ok.. I joke!) I actually like this person because he gives us a sort of spiritual consciousness and feeling of safety! The feeling/knowledge that God is watching after us. I was in one bus however where the guy made me feel more scared than safe. He kept mentioning how God had saved him from 5 previous crashes where almost everyone died except him… I started to wonder… perhaps the problem is with him… I was real close to pulling a ‘Jonah’ on him! Kicking him out of the bus. Lol.
  • Finally, there’s the reader/music person- Usually with music too loud or a book that just captivates her enough that she doesn’t pay attention to any other thing happening in the bus. The snorer doesn’t matter, neither does Emeka, the business mogul or the chit-chatters. Every other person in the bus is just there. Obviously, I, my humble self, fall into this category.

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So, not every character must be present in every bus, however, these characters are usually there.

Oya! Locate yourself and comment below!

Cheers!

Twitter + IG- El_freedah

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THE NYSC CHRONICLES

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The NYSC (National Youth Service Corps) year was established in Nigeria in an attempt to bring the nation together… I’m not too sure of the story (partly because I wasn’t really listening) but I vaguely remember being taught in NYSC orientation camp that it was created as a result of the civil war that happened from 1967-1970 in Nigeria.

After the war, the government thought it would be wise and would create some sort of harmony/symphony; if for one year after school, graduates would be posted to states they know nothing about to work. I assume they must’ve thought that by so doing, we would learn other people’s traditions and grow to respect them.

For those who are unaware, I graduated last year (2015) in May so according to the natural flow of things in my country (Nigeria); the next step is my Service Year. By October 2015, I had started my service year. Fortunately/unfortunately, like most things in Nigeria, NYSC is very fixable… based on my previous intro, you can tell that the aim was to take Northerners to the East or West(and vice versa) but unfortunately, people have found a way around it… I know a guy who has lived all his life in the North, schooled in the North and still found a way to get posted to the North… to his fathers company! (LOL)

I on the other hand, though I could’ve had it arranged, decided ‘it’s just one year’… ‘I’ll gain valuable life experiences’… all my friends have argued that I’m just stupid. =)) One actually called me and asked where I was; when I told her she said “But what are you doing there?” ..bear in mind this babe is a ‘corper’ like me oh! After I explained to her what I was “doing”, she burst out laughing and said “dude, you didn’t redeploy?”…

When I first got to my state of deployment after the Christmas holiday (which I shouldn’t have had but I’m a rebel like that), it dawned on me that… mehn this thing is real. I would call my parents through out that first week and just cry… sometimes, I’d be fine… then I’ll talk to my little brother and just breakdown again! – that child just has my heart!

Like most of my life’s situations, I found that writing about it made it easier to deal with… so I decided to start a series of posts about my service year… they may not be entertaining or educative… but it’s therapy for me and there’s still a 50% chance it will help you through seemingly tough situations.

That being said… sit tight and enjoy a year long ranting/therapy session from me!

Oh! By the way…

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Sorry for the drama… but before I sign out, I have an announcement to make.

Soon, my blog would have music on it… Lol. Yeah, I’ll be putting up songs from Nigerian Based Gospel Artists! I feel it’s necessary to support #GoodMusic #GodMusic and to support #NigerianMusic. It’s all still in the planning stage right now but as soon as I figure out how all these computer things work, we’ll take it global! This has been the main reason for the long silence but I decided that while I’m working on the logistics, I’ll give y’all something to read…

I’ll also be accepting a lot of guest writers/anonymous writer… so if you’ve got something to share that’ll help someone’s life, even if you’ll prefer to remain unknown… send it over to my email address freedah.addo@gmail.com .

I might also start a column where we can ask questions… if you’re too shy to place a question in your name, you can trust me enough to keep your secret. Send all anonymous questions to the above email address and hopefully my readers and I can help you out. Trust me, I need this too! Lol.

Thank you for reading today… and see you real soon!

CHEERS!

Freda Fred-Addo

Twitter +IG- @el_freedah